Trouble The Waters

My Last Gay Rights Manifesto

When I decided to move "Diary Of A Gay Wage Slave" to my new blog, Ignorance Is Plentiful,  it left a hole in Christ, The Gay Martyr that needed filling. I decided to write a new 200th post, and make it a second Gay Rights Manifesto. My first Manifesto still appears at the bottom of this blog, and I recently posted a Transgender Manifesto in my sidebar; both are still valid, and I have no intention of replacing them. However, I have some new thoughts about what needs to happen before LGBT equality can be realized. What follows is the closing statement I want to leave my readership with before making Christ, The Gay Martyr completely and permanently inactive. I won't be posting any more special features here; this is it, folks!

Trolling Google Image for blog photos, as I often do, I stumbled across a stunning piece of art. You can see it yourself over the opening paragraph of this essay. It's a sculpture by the legendary male physique artist George Quaintance, completed in 1936. You're looking at two Art Deco masks fused together to make one: One mask is female, and the other male. I adore Art Deco design, and at first, all I did was admire this beautiful piece of craftsmanship. As I kept looking at it, though, a strange thrill began to course through me.

Suddenly, I realized that this wasn't just a good-looking sculpture. This was a representation of Transgender humanity: Masculinity and femininity occupying the same space, blended so as to form a separate gender all its own. Knowing something about George Quaintance's approach to art, I think that's exactly what he intended it to symbolize. If I'm right, then he did so magnificently; he totally captured the essence of inborn androgyny.

Are you an LGBT person? Then take a good look at that Quaintance sculpture. It's a visualization of your inner self. What do you think? Are you amazed? Are you repelled? Can you handle confronting the truth about what you are? Or can you only see yourself through the eyes of your oppressors?

There's an idea: Let's look at ourselves through their eyes for a moment. Most of the time when LesBiGay people are discriminated against, it isn't because of their sexual orientation. Most Straight people never see us have sex, and most of us aren't in the habit of discussing our sexual exploits with them! We are bullied, threatened, ostracized and assaulted because of our gender expression. Our voices are too high, or too low. Our hair is too long, or too short, or the wrong color. We don't wear clothing that's masculine or feminine enough. We don't have interests that are considered appropriate for "real men" or "real women". We don't carry ourselves in the way "real men" and "real women" are expected to. We don't make sense to anyone whose understanding of gender is binary. We are people who transcend gender (which is why all of us have a right to identify as Transgender), and that makes people who don't transcend it very uncomfortable in our presence.

Fighting anti-Gay bias in this world necessarily involves challenging narrow concepts of gender. Binary gender is like a book that you've only read two-thirds of the way and then put down: The story isn't complete until you've read the final chapters! On those unread pages, there's a world that's populated by more than just male and female life forms. Transgender life forms also exist! We always have, we always will, and it's time for us to insist that the world acknowledge our existence.

Scientists like Simon LeVay have recently uncovered biological markers for Transgender status, but I didn't need their findings to discover who I am. I came to know my true gender from studying the Bible and Gnostic texts. Christian scripture, widely thought to condemn Gay people, gave me the key that unlocked the truth about same-gender sexuality. The Gospel of Philip describes how Jesus Christ gifts a chosen few with "male and female power" before birth, causing them to be born with the blended gender of God. As I've written before, parallel doctrine exists in the annals of many, if not most of the world's oldest religions.

Carrying both male and female gender in the same body was at one time widely viewed as a blessed state. We should endeavor to reclaim that blessed status, and begin to feel the pride in our uniqueness that we merely pretend to feel now. When Gay Pride becomes more than just a popular concept, I bet we'll feel less of an urge to strip down, booze up, get strung out and/or clown around in the streets under the guise of celebration. We'll no longer need to camouflage our self-hatred that way!

This thing I describe as blended gender is called "Fullness" in Scripture.  It exists within all LGBT folk. So, you may ask, why doesn't it make us all Gay, or all Bisexual, or all Transsexual? Why is there variation? I think variation occurs because different people respond to its presence in different ways. Or, it may be a question of degree, with some of us possessing more of the blend, and others possessing less. Whatever the case, Fullness is inborn; all this bullsh*t speculating about "environmental factors" and "outside influences" should've ended long ago! You can't "learn" how to become Gay or Transsexual; core identity can't be taught to or imposed on a person! The negative experiences of intersex individuals, forced as children into gender roles that violated their self-concept, tell us as much.

By the way, when I talk about blended gender, I am not referring to intersex genitalia! I'm not talking about genitalia at all. I'm speaking of something that exists on a spiritual level. As gender-transcending human beings, the form our genitalia takes is of very little significance. It matters in our sexual relations, and it matters if we want to produce offspring, but that's about it. The bodies our Transgender souls are born into don't define us like the bodies of binary gender folk define them; one way or another, an LGBT person will always challenge conventional notions about masculinity and femininity. We can't help but do it; it's our nature!

Fullness trumps (s)expectations; it has its own unalterable norms. Cultural pressure can't change them. Punitive laws can't change them. Religious belief can't change them. Psychotherapy can't change them. Surgery and hormone treatments can only create the illusion of changing them. Fullness is a gift from God that can't be returned, no matter how much we may want to!

But why should we want to? The thing to never forget is that Transgender status is completely normal. It's God's balance of nature. The sexual union of men with women is meant to approximate the Fullness that we received as a birthright; that's why the Savior excluded our kind from heterosexual marriage (Matthew 19). To me, it's perfectly logical: If people can be born with blended racial background, why can't they be born with blended gender, too? I see LGBT humanity as just another aspect of the tremendous natural diversity that God loves. Millennia have passed since life began on Earth, but every so often, we still hear about a previously unknown species of plant or animal; the Lord's imagination and creative ability knows no bounds! It makes a skilled artisan like George Quaintance look like a caveman carving stones; and we who possess God's "male and female power" number among His finest creations. Let me say this one last time:

Nothing that God creates is queer!

I call for an end to the lies heterosexual folk tell about us! Enough of these insane accusations of "recruitment"! No more vilification! No more pretending that we prey on Straight people like Dracula preys on virgins! No more pretending that Bible scripture justifies excluding us from church sacraments! No more claims that we contaminate any environment we become part of!   No more equating us with pedophiles and polygamists and bestialists! No more falsehoods about our relationships "threatening" the traditional family! No more equating our love to rape and ancient temple prostitution!  No more papal pronouncements that our existence throws nature out of balance! No more demagoguery to the effect that God is punishing humankind because of our presence!

I also call for an end to the many delusions LGBT folk entertain. No more facetious claims of having "chosen" our sexual orientation! No more accepting stereotypes as truth! No more calling sex in public restrooms an expression of "Gay culture"! No more pretending that unprotected sexual activity won't result in serious consequences! No more thinking of ourselves as men trapped inside women's bodies, or vice-versa! No more pretending that surgery can remove a person's Transgender status! No more insisting that Transsexual status is an illness while finding no fault with the sick society that rejects its validity!

No more pretending that we're exactly the same as heterosexual folk except for who we sleep with! No more arguments that we don't "need" certain rights that heterosexual folk enjoy! No more lying to LGBT kids about bullying getting "better" when all that happens most of the time is a change in the type of bullying and who's doing it! No more believing that Scripture condemns our unique gender expression (it doesn't)! No more accepting religious bigots as doctrinal authorities! And please! No more pretending that heterosexist and transphobic slurs can be "reclaimed" and made empowering!

The word "queer" must go! It connotes defectiveness and perversion. It stigmatizes God's blessing of Fullness! It belongs to an ignorant past that we must break free of. If you're in the habit of dropping this dehumanizing label into casual conversation, wash out your mouth and mind; gargle twice and spit! Starting today, I'm on a crusade to replace "queer" with the term "gender-neutral". If an umbrella term is needed, as many of us seem to believe, then this is a far more accurate one. It defines more precisely who we are and what we have in common as Lesbians, Gay men, Bisexual and Transsexual persons. Most important, it's refreshingly free of denigrating connotations!

We need to stop wearing the oppressor's hand-me-down hate speech! Dignity looks so much better on us. We must force ourselves and others to speak of blended gender with respect, and get used to hearing it spoken of in that way.

Respecting yourself is about more than just the language you use. It also has to do with the way you treat yourself, and how you let others treat you. There's a multitude of Gay activists around; just turn over a rock, and one is sure to crawl out from under it! Yet I find that relatively few of them want to change conditions for LesBiGay people in any substantive way.

Too many of us have made our peace with the demeaning jokes, the ugly slurs, the outrageous stereotypes. We've resigned ourselves to the persecution, the stigmatization, the lack of security in our persons. Most of us haven't got the stomach for taking the fight against bigotry to the oppressor's door, so in a pinch, phony political posturing suffices! At the end of the day, we're content to stay walled off in a little corner of the world set aside for misfits, a place devoid of dignity that doesn't even provide us with safe harbor.

We crave distractions from the injustices we suffer. We escape into pageants, parties and cliques, campy humor, mindless celebrity worship and reckless sexual excess. Numbing our pain with drink, drugs and booty, we can barely feel that boot on the back of our necks . . . why, our necks could snap and we wouldn't even notice! We'd never admit it, but we've adapted ourselves to a discriminatory status quo. Within our myriad social classes and cultural traditions, we've learned how to accommodate heterosexism, and God forbid we should trouble the waters too much!

Lord knows how much I want to trouble those waters!

I want to trouble them so bad sometimes, I can hardly stand it! I want a Category Five hurricane, global warming crisis, multi-funnel tornado and tsunami all rolled into one! I want to see all the complacency and compromise and corruption swept away. I want to see the cleansing rain come down, and then I want to see the sunshine after the rain. I'm so ready!

I want this social upheaval so passionately because of the way I grew up: An effeminate boy all but crippled by shame, repeatedly beaten down by ignorance, terrified of the world outside his door. It was an intolerable way to grow up, and I can't stand to think about anyone else suffering that way. How can we settle for business as usual when we know a new LGBT generation is falling victim to hate crimes every day (those they commit against themselves as well as those perpetrated by others)?

Oh, we're making a big militant noise right now, but it's still business as usual: Begging politicians for favors; nibbling around the edges of mass protest; letting the religious Right Wing wipe its filthy feet on our backs; talking up revolution whenever we get the chance, but never walking the talk. It's nothing but a lot of pussyfooting around, and I'm sick to death of it!

When we finally get serious about Gay Rights, we'll be waging the fight against discrimination in six key arenas: In religious institutions; in educational institutions; in the courts; in the streets; in the media; and in our own hearts! (Take note that I didn't mention the political arena. That was deliberate! Let's chill out with the Washington lobbying until we have some real power to wield there.)

We'll be turning up the temperature in our churches, mosques and synagogues until they become boiling pools of unrest. We'll be condemning "faith-based" opposition to Gay Rights, and correcting religious doctrine that calls Transgender expression sinful. We'll be banishing "Queer Studies" from the classroom, mandating comprehensive sex education and anti-bullying measures, and promoting genuine scholarship on Transgender identity. We'll be ripping the blindfold off of Lady Justice so that her eyes can perceive the abusive excesses of unchecked religious freedom.

We'll be making mass protest a reality, filling the public square to demand tax relief as compensation for institutional heterosexism and transphobia. We'll be demanding accurate, consistent and respectful media representation (especially in ads and entertainment media), and blowing the damn roof off if we don't see it! We'll finally have realized that a distorted portrayal can be as bad or worse than invisibility; and when it comes to rooting out the entrenched shame that comes between us and our dignity, we'll be as relentless as the Red Chinese rooting out counter-revolutionary influences. That's what serious Gay activism will look like!

I believe what the old Negro spiritual says: God's gonna trouble the waters! And just like the runaway slaves who originally sang that song, we LGBT folk must wade in troubled waters before we can set foot on the dry land of liberation.

This essay is dedicated to the memory of Haitian-American poet, editor and performance artist Assotto Saint, who showed me the path when I was not yet ready to walk it.

My Militant Gay Christian Credo (Part One)

You punished me for telling you my hopes and dreams/
I'm breakin' all the rules I didn't make/
You took my words and made a trap for silly fools/
You held me down and tried to make me break

Did I say something wrong?/
Oops! I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex/
(I must have been crazy)/
Did I stay too long?/
Oops! I didn't know I couldn't speak my mind/
(What was I thinking?)

And I'm not sorry*

1. I believe that Gay people are as essential to this planet as the rain forests, if not more. For example, if all the LGBT people now working in service occupations . . . all the nurses, technicians, waiters, maintenance people, bus, cab and truck drivers, social workers, translators, morticians, hairdressers, administrative assistants and customer service reps . . . if all of them were to suddenly disappear from the face of the Earth, what would happen? Civilization as we know it would grind to a dead halt and never recover from the loss! To say nothing of what would happen if all the LGBT folk involved in organized religion ever disappeared . . . now, that's a prospect too horrible to even contemplate!

2. I believe there’s no such thing as a minority group whose identity is based on sexual practice. When I hear LGBT folk talk about themselves in that way, I never take them seriously. I know most Straight people don’t, either! If the only reason you call yourself Gay is a habit of getting off with people of the same gender, you’re lying to yourself. Being Gay is not about “the Big O”! Being Gay is about getting beaten up for not acting like other boys. Being Gay is about parents turning away from you in shame. Being Gay is about being led to believe that God despises you. Being Gay is about survival, dammit! It infuriates me to hear ignorant people reduce my identity to an ejaculation scene in a porn film. I was Gay long before I knew what sex was, and I’ll be Gay long after I’ve forgotten what sex is.

3. I believe that LGBT identity is a gift from God. It’s not a curse. It’s not an illness. It’s not a perversion, an aberration, or a “choice”. I believe it constitutes a separate gender, and is a combination of male and female on the spiritual level. The Bible says that God Himself is an androgynous entity, so what greater gift could He give a human being? If you think that's provocative, here's something to really rock your world: Decades ago, LGBT folk adopted the rainbow as their symbol. Centuries ago, the Lord sent down a rainbow to symbolize His Covenant with humankind (Genesis 9: 13-17). Could it be His Covenant rainbow takes two different forms? Maybe it doesn't just appear as color and light in the sky. Maybe it also appears as flesh and blood . . .

4. I believe that a person is born with Gay, Bisexual or Transsexual identity. When you hear actresses like Anne Heche claim they didn’t become Lesbians until they met same-gender partners, do you find them credible? Don’t bet money, honey! These women may be Bisexual, but they aren’t Lesbians, and they never will be. If you are homosexual, you are homosexual from cradle to grave; a birthright is forever! Certain people, especially those who identify themselves as "queer", take strong exception to that understanding, but I really couldn't care less! It’s the right understanding. LGBT identity is not "fluid", it is constant. There's no such thing as a "pregnant man" of binary gender. Elephants don't turn into monkeys, Gay people don't turn into Straight people, and Transsexual children don't grow up to be biological males and females. That's reality! "Ex-Gay” programs and “gender reassignment” surgeries exist to exploit those of us who feel we must conform to human concepts of gender and sexuality. These "corrective" measures may alter appearance and behavior, but they don't and won't ever have the power to alter inborn LGBT status.

5. I believe that Jesus Christ talked approvingly about Gay men. I believe we are the “eunuchs who have been so from birth” that He spoke of in Matthew 19. I also believe we are the “first fruits for God and the Lamb” who serve as His personal attendants in Revelations 14. In addition to those passages, Gay men (and Lesbians) are discussed at length in the Gnostic Gospel of Philip, the Secret Book of John, and the Egyptian Gospel (see my series of posts titled "We Are Family" under the Gay Identity tab). The Messiah described born eunuchs as a separate class from ordinary males. He connected them to the kingdom of Heaven, and stated quite explicitly that they could not follow the teachings He gave to ordinary males. Why, then, would anyone think that Biblical prohibitions directed at ordinary males would apply to them? They do not, and they never have!

6. I believe that there were specific teachings directed at God’s born eunuchs in the early Christian church. The historical record suggests that those teachings were systematically suppressed and destroyed by an ultra-conservative church hierarchy. Fortunately, archaeologists have partially recovered some of those Gnostic writings, such as this one:

THE GOSPEL OF THOMAS 22

(Jesus Christ said) When you make male and female into a single one, so that the male will not be male nor the female be female . . . then you will enter(the kingdom).

These fragments are now widely available in bookstores and libraries. What they reveal is astounding; a radically different picture of LGBT identity as it relates to Christianity emerges from these texts. If only more Christians would study them, a much-needed process of doctrinal correction could begin.

7. I believe that many “welcoming” ministries are led by preachers who see LGBT folk as abominations to God. In their hearts, they doubt that Gay souls can be saved, and they only suffer Gay parishioners out of a sense of obligation. Around 185 BC, a Jewish theologian wrote these wise words:

SIRACH 20:3
Like a eunuch lusting to violate a girl is the person who does right under compulsion.

By nature, a born eunuch has no interest in heterosexual relations, so with this teaching, Sirach indicted people who act contrary to their natural inclinations. That's exactly what these preachers do! What's more, their perception of Gay men and Lesbians as damned people no doubt filters down to LGBT believers, reinforcing feelings of shame and guilt. This makes their churchgoing experience bittersweet at best, and toxic at worst. A toxic ministry yields toxic faith(You will know them by their fruits: Matthew 7:20). How can toxic faith lead to life eternal? It can only lead to death! Before they accept an invitation from a "welcoming" congregation, the LesBiGay Christian must discern whether he is being asked to join a living church or a church of the dead.

8. I believe that Gay and Lesbian couples have the right to legally marry, and not only in a Justice of the Peace’s office. They have the right to perform Holy Union inside a church! Anyone wanting Scriptural justification for same-gender marriage need only read the narrative of David and Jonathan in I and II Samuel. It states that these men’s souls were bound together. As Rev. Rick Bretlinger so eloquently affirms in his flawed but often brilliant book Gay Christian 101, that’s a description of spiritual marriage performed by God! No one but God can bind souls. What He did in Biblical times He still does today; male couples and female couples miraculously fall in love and decide to share their lives, just as David and Jonathan did(again, read the narrative). How dare clergy refuse to recognize covenants which the Lord has sanctioned? And how dare they do so in the Lord’s own house?

"Militant Gay Christian Credo" concludes with Part Two.

My Militant Gay Christian Credo (Part Two)

You wouldn't let me say the words I longed to say/
You didn't want to see life through my eyes/
You tried to shove me back inside your narrow room/
And silence me with bitterness and lies

Did I say something true?/
Oops! I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex/
(I must've been crazy)/
Did I have a point of view?/
Oops! I didn't know I couldn't talk about you/
(What was I thinking?)

And I'm not sorry*

9. I believe that organized religion owes LGBT folk around the world an official apology! The Pope and other religious leaders should apologize for all the suffering, savagery and discrimination we've had to endure as a direct result of their hatemongering theology; and after they do it, every one of them should fall down prostrate before God and beg His pardon for the capital sin of distorting His Holy Word. Do you think it's disrespectful for me to suggest such a thing? Then you don't understand the meaning of disrespect! Gay people understand its meaning. I understand. Whenever I think about the millions of families that have been torn apart; the millions of victims who've been brutalized and murdered; the scores of innocents who've been jailed and executed; the dozens of livelihoods and reputations that have been destroyed, and especially the countless number of human spirits that have been traumatized and broken, I feel the blood begin to boil within my veins. Reparations are definitely in order here! I would join a class action lawsuit in a heartbeat; wouldn't you?

10. I believe that LGBT children have the right to grow up without being terrorized. Actress Ellen DeGeneres has said that LesBiGay folk aren’t meant to be separated from the general population, and she's right; nobody should ever feel obligated to live in a Gay ghetto. However, before we go out and confront the ignorance of the world, we should be allowed to live a reasonably normal childhood. Living in fear of your grade school classmates isn’t normal! You can’t concentrate on learning mutiplication tables when you have to endure constant threats and beatings; believe me, I know! As long as machismo and religious bigotry are allowed to run rampant in society, LGBT-supportive schools like New York’s Harvey Milk High will be necessary.

11. I believe that the Gay Rights movement should prioritize Gay Rights. I decry the anything-but-Gay-Rights agenda of activist groups like beyondmarriage.org! There's no rule that says individual Lesbians and Gay men can't participate in environmental activism, anti-poverty programs, anti-war demonstrations, lobbying for immigration reform and other important concerns. Who will take our specific concerns seriously, though, if we don't? It's neither necessary nor desirable for Gay Rights organizations to be the hub of all Left Wing causes. Ours should be the kind of movement where Liberals, Moderates and Conservatives can find common ground on such core issues as partnership recognition, employment non-discrimination, access to societal institutions, and personal safety. Our increasing reluctance to stand up for our own interests is appalling and shameful. Sylvia Rivera and other Stonewall rebels who have since passed on must be turning over in their graves!

12. I believe that Gay Pride is, by and large, a myth. Many, perhaps even a majority of us LGBT folk feel deeply ashamed and conflicted about our gender identity and/or sexual orientation. How could we not, when most of the cultures and religions we grow up with openly despise us? We hide our shame under false bravado, but act it out with self-destructive behavior like drug abuse, spousal abuse, derogatory self-labeling, membership in homophobic churches and unsafe sexual practice. There will be no true Gay Pride until LGBT folk reclaim their birthright as blessed people of God! The ability to copulate with persons of the same gender is nothing, in itself, to be proud of. However, knowing that you are closer to the image of God than other human beings is definitely a source of pride.

13. I believe that crude stereotypes and labels limit the aspirations of minority groups and promote falsehoods about them. This is never more true than when minority groups themselves embrace the crude depictions. The rise of Hip-Hop culture is a case in point: Its glorification of Black thuggery and obsession with the words "n*gger" and "b*tch" has distorted the image of African-Americans all over the world. While I do support the right of people to choose their own labels, that support comes with two caveats: 1) The labels they choose must be accurate. 2) The labels they choose mustn’t stigmatize. You may love to play with slurs and stereotypes, but that doesn’t give you the right to spread ignorance about an oppressed people(you got that, Adam Joseph?)!!! Also, don't expect me to suffer silently while you portray my kind as sex perverts just for the thrill of doing so(are you listening, Tristan Taormino?)!

14. I believe Straight allies are absolutely necessary to the struggle. Surely, the heroic actions of San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsome on behalf of marriage equality have proven that point! Understand me: when I say Straight allies, I’m not talking about heterosexual folk who pay periodic lip service to Gay Rights; I’m talking about folks who really do “get it”! They feel our pain. Singer Cyndi Lauper all but defines Gay activism with her strident, hands-on advocacy; and Jeanne Phillips, author of the famous "Dear Abby" column, has more Gay militancy in her pinkie finger than most self-described “RadiQueers” have in their entire bodies! A few years ago, Ms. Phillips caused quite a stir when she made this statement to the Associated Press:

If Gay Americans are not allowed to get married and have all the benefits that American citizens are entitled to by the Bill of Rights, they should get one Hell of a tax break!

Wow! When was the last time you heard a Lesbian or Gay man say something so revolutionary? That’s the kind of attitude that drove the Suffragettes into the streets! That’s the kind of attitude LGBT folk need in order to effectively combat their oppressors. Pageants, parades and watching DVD episodes of "Dante's Cove" sure won’t get the job done!

15. I believe that Jesus Christ, in His human form, was an LGBT person: Either Gay, Bisexual or Transsexual. I believe that His constant companion, Mary of Magdala, was an LGBT person as well. I believe there were Gay men among the Savior's Apostles, and Lesbians among the women who traveled with Him. I'm convinced that the Apostle Paul, perhaps the greatest Christian theologian who ever lived, was a Gay man who struggled to accept his own sexuality. I base these perceptions on clues found in both canonical and Gnostic scripture. I acknowledge the possiblity that my perceptions are wrong; I'm certainly not infallible. However, if they're accurate, and I truly believe they are, then the church's rejection of LGBT folk is nothing less than an unpardonable blasphemy.

16. I believe that ignorance is the greatest impediment to the well-being of humankind. It is Satan’s primary tool, more threatening to life on Earth than global warming, pre-emptive war and nuclear proliferation put together. Certainly, there is no greater stumbling block to LBGT equality than ignorance! We must endeavor to root out this pestilence, not only in our enemies, but also in ourselves.

These sixteen declarations summarize what I believe about religion, politics and Gay identity. They're an expression of who I am: Defiantly Christian, proudly androgynous, dangerously outspoken, neither Liberal nor Conservative, not into games, egos or petty politics, not impressed by radicalism, not intimidated by orthodoxy, no respecter of persons, and not one to suffer fools gladly. A Black Gay American with a modicum of dignity, a smidgen of self-respect, an abundance of common sense, and a bushel basketful of Old School values that I’m not ashamed to put on display. So tell me, sugar . . . how do you like me now?

"Credo" was originally posted 19 July 2008.

*excerpts from the song "Human Nature", Copyright ©1994 WB Music Corporation/Webo Girl Publishing (ASCAP). Music and Lyrics written by Madonna Louise Ciccone, Milo Deering, Dave Hall and Kevin and Shawn McKenzie, originally performed by Madonna.

My Final Book of Testimony (Part One)

Christ, The Gay Martyr contains exactly 200 blogposts. There are 192 original essays and eight pages of "Testimony", which function as a Table of Contents. As I look back over five years of online punditry, I see quality that I wish had been more consistent. Some of my earlier essays really suck! They look like things I might've written during my teens, and it's hard for me to read them now; but quite a few are worth reading. I'm happy to say this final batch of fifty posts doesn't stink; it's pretty good work, especially considering the tremendous workplace pressure I was under when I wrote them. I thank God for giving me fortitude and inspiration; the best things on this blog were all co-authored by Him. If I'm presumptuous enough to consider CTGM an important body of work, that's why! I'm damn proud of it.

Along with hundreds of other American bloggers, I expressed my outrage at the Wall Street bailout of 2008. I poured that outrage into a denunciation of both the Democrat and Republican parties that I titled "Lipstick On A Fascist Pig." If corruption in government has improved one little bit since then, I haven't noticed! At this writing, Congress has yet to impose restrictions on banks that speculate with their clients' money, and a second massive corporate bailout has just been approved, this time for the health insurance industry. What else did you think that so-called health care reform legislation was? You can bet it won't bail out people like you or me when, just like before, we find ourselves overwhelmed by medical bills and exorbitant prescription drug costs.

"Lipstick" was my first attempt to broaden the scope of this blog beyond obviously Gay subject matter. My main focus was always on Gay-related topics, though. In the case of “Defaming Diahann Carroll”, that topic was the Gay media’s increasing fondness for slurs, not just sexual but racial. Seldom have I ever felt more infuriated than when I saw The New York Blade’s profile of a legendary African-American actress in which the author flippantly identified her as a “Black b*tch”. In this essay, I warned Blade staffers that the bad things they did would come back to bite them in the ass. Could it be mere coincidence, then, that the Blade publications went belly-up earlier this year? Oh, I certainly hope not!

When Rev. Jerry Maneker shared with me his joy at officiating his first same-gender wedding, I celebrated him in my two-part essay “Love Makes A Marriage”. This essay is my definitive statement on marriage equality; I’d treated the topic before, but never in such depth. Those who’ve likened me to a preacher certainly found evidence to support that belief in this paragraph: I've got disturbing news for all these "Christian" fundamentalists who believe that homosexual relations are sinful. They can dismiss it at their own peril! They won't walk through the gates of Heaven one second sooner because they persecuted those of us who practice same-gender love. On the contrary, if they become so caught up in sanctioning the perceived sins of others that they ignore their own sinful behavior, they won't walk through those gates at all. Make no mistake: A person's eligibility for Eternal Life doesn't depend on what he stops other people from doing. It depends on what he stops himself from doing! Breaking the Lord's commandment to love your neighbor as yourself is definitely something anybody who calls himself a Christian should stop, and he should stop it right now and not later! I’m not a preacher and have no aspirations to become one, really I don’t. I just get carried away sometimes! Who can help it, though, when the Gospel of Jesus Christ gets so viciously distorted?

“Proving Me Wrong” was my cautious welcoming gesture to Barack Hussein Obama as our nation’s new Chief Executive. His candidacy put a bad taste in my mouth from the very beginning, but I held out hope that he'd be a catalyst for the right kind of change at the Federal level. Soon after I posted this op-ed, President-Elect Obama chose smiley-faced Bible bigot Rick Warren to officiate at his inaugural ceremony. I almost wrote the follow-up confirming my worst fears in January of 2009, but I decided to wait and see what other unfriendly surprises Mr. Obama had in store for us. I had quite a long list to share when I skewered him with my “Proving Me Right” essay in January of 2010. If that list were compiled today, I could add to it a new betrayal: The Obama Justice Department's defense of the US military's "Don't Ask/Don't Tell" policy. The President fights to keep this discriminatory law on the books, even while he calls for its repeal in a State of the Union address! This craven politician has no shame whatsoever. It frightens me that we’re not even halfway through his first term yet; what further outrages will this "Liberal" administration subject LGBT Americans to? Even with Sarah Palin and Mitt Romney eagerly waiting in the wings, I hope there won’t be a second Obama term. Given a choice between a wolf in sheep’s clothing and an undisguised wolf, I’d rather take my chances with the genuine article!

The stubborn insistence of Gay activists to waste their limited resources on anti-Gay ballot measure campaigns prompted me to write a two-part speech called “Save The Country” in December 2008. I’ve never actually presented it as a speech, but who knows? Maybe that can still happen someday. I scheduled a whole day to research legal grounds for marriage equality in the US Constitution. It took me less than twenty minutes to find it in not one, but two places: Article IV, Section 2, and the Fourteenth Amendment. I wanted to focus our attention on those passages, as well as on the Declaration of Independence, so that Gay people could see for themselves the birthright citizenship protections that many of us don’t believe exist. For good measure, I threw in some Southern belle militancy from the late Mrs. Rosa Parks, and closed with a few lines from Laura Nyro’s excellent 1970 song “Save The Country”. My objective was to lessen our feelings of desperation and inspire pride within us; not Gay Pride, but American pride! Drawing direct parallels between the LGBT equality movement and our nation's other historic Civil Rights struggles is something that isn’t nearly done often enough. This is one of those essays that roused me from bed in the dead of night, and frankly, I think it’s one of the best things I’ve ever written.

Odd, how my musical tastes always seem to find their way into my essays! “One Bad Apple”, my two-part op-ed about the homophobia of Donny Osmond, is a typical example. Whenever I see Donny on TV or even hear his name, my mind immediately goes back to Top Forty radio in the 1970s, and the catchy Pop tunes he and his family churned out back then. Did I love me some “Down By The Lazy River”, or what? How sad that such delightful American music is tainted by the fact that its source espouses hateful ignorance. Even sadder is the possibility that said ignorance may have contributed to the recent death of Marie Osmond’s art student son, who committed suicide after writing that he “just couldn’t fit in”. That Michael Blosil may have been the latest victim of anti-Gay persecution in the Mormon church is something quite horrible to contemplate. Let’s all pray that, if Michael really was Gay, his grieving mother will have the courage to use his loss as a tool to reform Mormon doctrine. If she can manage to do that, God will replace the child she lost with thousands of grateful Gay Mormon kids. For sure, she needs to be able to take some comfort away from this tragedy. However, until reform happens, I must agree with guest commentator Jerry Maneker’s advice that Gay Christians treat Mormon churches like the Plague!

Mormons also figure into my next two-parter, “Echoes From A Birmingham Jail” from January of 2009. Judging from the response it generated, this is the most popular essay I've ever posted on Christ, The Gay Martyr. That’s not in small part due to the fact that after I cross-posted it in the diary section of Pam’s House Blend, Pam Spaulding made the surprising decision to feature it on her blog’s front page. (Predictably, its dignified message was lost on some of her Blenders, one of whom remarked that reading it made her feel “proud to be ‘queer’”! Lord, deliver me! What does it take to instill self-esteem in some LGBT folk?) However, what really boosted the popularity of this essay were the stirring, immortal words of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr, written in 1963 while he cooled his heels in a dirty Alabama jail cell. Just as I had with “Save The Country”, I wanted to remind readers that their equality struggle is squarely in the mainstream of American Civil Rights crusades. How better to do that than with polemic from America’s finest Civil Rights crusader? The masterful way in which Dr. King indicted the “Conservative” church leadership of his day and exposed incrementalism as a tool of oppression has never been surpassed. I admit that I wrote this essay partially as an excuse to shower adoration on Dr. King’s rhetorical skill. I made sure to ladle some much-deserved kudos on Coretta Scott King, too! She wasn’t half the orator her husband was, but when it came to championing Gay Rights, Mrs. King took his moral crusade to a higher level. Her importance to our movement has never been properly acknowledged.

“Anytime You’re Ready” was my four-part follow-up to “Echoes from A Birmingham Jail”, a broadside attack on Gay complacency. It wasn’t anywhere near as popular, but I think it makes an important point. So much of what we do undermines the Gay Rights movement: The “reclaiming” of hateful pejoratives, the shrugging-off of bad treatment by public officials, the absurd statements used to justify our own counter-productive behavior, the attempts to pass off political haplessness as political sophistication. Some of us even feel the need to defend bigots and their bigotry! While I've long believed that the Gay blogosphere is swarming with Right Wing moles, all too often we enable our own oppression and seem eager to do so. In retrospect, I think this essay was too long; it would’ve been a much tighter composition had I edited it down to a handful of succinct statements like this one from Part Two: Anytime we're ready, we can start having a Gay Rights movement that declares zero tolerance for any kind of anti-Gay expression. Anytime we're ready, we can start demanding respect as fully entitled human beings. Anytime we're ready, we can start acting like people worthy of a champion like the late Coretta Scott King. As long as we make excuses for heterosexist hatemongers, adopt the wicked insults they impose on us, "counsel" one another on which Constitutional rights are desirable or not, and rank LGBT equality lower than any other national goal, then I'll know we're not ready! Then again, had I edited it down, I probably wouldn’t have ripped apart those miserable excuses for Christian prayers that were offered at President Obama’s inauguration. Somebody really needed to do that, and I’m glad it was me!

“The Dumb Dora Awards” was begun as an outlet for my increasing frustration at Gay activist idiocy. It was only going to be a sidebar feature, but one day, I had the idea of compiling ten of the award winners into a two-part post. It turned out to be one of my most thoughtful and provocative essays yet, and thoughtful provocation is what this blog specializes in! I quickly decided to make it an ongoing series. My first awards "ceremony" was held in March of 2009, and another followed in July of the same year. This feature is so easy to put together, it almost writes itself; the most difficult thing for me is coming up with novel award categories. Counter-Productive Pranksterism, Make-Believe Activism, Airheaded Editorializing and Impersonation of a House Negro are some of my most memorable. This series with an admittedly sarcastic edge allows me to do what I’m often urged to do: Lighten up a little bit! Yet there's plenty of room for me to make sharp observations about the sorry state of Gay activism nowadays. Little did I suspect when I launched “The Dumb Dora Awards” that it would one day host its own blog (called Ignorance Is Plentiful) and herald the end of Christ, The Gay Martyr as an active online document.

"Shine" was my recurring showcase for exceptional LGBT folk of color. My tough criteria made honorees hard to find, but frankly, I probably didn't look hard enough. I only conferred role model honors on three people. When I heard about Math teacher Chance Nalley, I knew he had to be one of them. Mr. Nalley’s decision to share his same-gender nuptials with the entire seventh grade class of his Progressive high school made him a natural; I could hardly wait to profile this courageous man. It didn’t hurt that his story allowed me to gnaw on one of my long-time pet peeves: The reluctance of Gay activists to combat heterosexism in the most logical of settings, an elementary or secondary school! What could be more desirable than nipping ignorance in the bud as early as possible? Teach ‘em while they’re young, and it’s less likely you’ll have to worry about them voting down your citizenship rights when they grow up! I’m not naïve: I know it's all but impossible for most LesBiGay teachers to do what Chance Nalley did in April of 2009. What’s more, not many teachers would want a high school class present at something so private as their wedding(in this case, a Civil Union), regardless of sexual orientation! However, he saw the ceremony as (dare I say it?) a chance to extend his mandate to educate outside the classroom. He honored his calling in an exceptionally selfless way. Bully for him! (I can’t believe I actually wrote that . . . I must be channeling Teddy Roosevelt!) His community is better for him having done it. We must rid ourselves of the homophobic idea that instruction about LGBT issues doesn’t belong in the schools. Gaining greater access to educational institutions is an all-important goal that we must not shrink from!

I haven’t investigated, but I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that “The Perfect Blend” is one of my least popular postings. It flies in the face of much common wisdom about Transsexual identity. I'd be the first to admit having radical views about Transfolk. I believe that Transgender status is a unique and separate gender. I do not believe in the concept of gender confusion! I do not believe female biology is necessary in order for female identity to be legitimate, or vice-versa. I have never and will never believe that people are born into "the wrong body". I believe, as ancient cultures did, that there are people in this world who share blended gender status with God. I thought about writing this piece for a very long time, and I prayed for the right words. Our Mother/Father in Heaven gave me this to say: Transgender consciousness today is where Gay consciousness was in the 1950s; the consensus is that Transfolk are sick and in need of medical treatment. So long as the pathologizing of Transgender bodies continues, Transgender people will never have society's respect. I remember watching a segment of "In The Life", public television's monthly LGBT newsmagazine, and recoiling from a theatre piece in which pitiable Transsexual women bemoaned not having vaginas. Seldom have I ever seen anything so retrograde! Just as is the case with Lesbians, Gay men and Bisexual folk, there's an urgent need for Transsexual consciousness-raising! It is God's will that male and female sometimes exist within the same body; the various problems Transfolk suffer have everything, and I do mean everything, to do with denial of that fact. If the world ever lets go of that denial, the lives of Transsexual men and women will improve remarkably. Let me send out a virtual high five to everybody who's boycotting the release of Ticked-Off Trannies With Knives, an appalling new "transploitation" flick. Way to go! At least the "T" in LGBT seems to realize that being taken seriously as a people is a big deal. Burlesque show "trannies" brandishing knives will never be any match for real-life Transsexual Americans brandishing self-respect!

"The Final Book of Testimony" concludes with Part Two.